We have our phalanges on the pulse of legal strategies.
Our team
Managing Shareholder/Partner
Herbert S. Bones, Esq.
With humble beginnings in Death Valley, California, Mr. Bones knows that the key to successful client representation lays not simply in efficient communication - but the orchestrated dismantling of the human psyche.
Mr. Bones specializes in negotiations, contested estates, and lawn darts. Mr. Bones has successfully participated in over seventeen trials by combat, and has survived exorcisms in over six courts located in both the State of Californa and Alaska.
In his free time, Mr. Bones is an avid sport fisher and knitting enthusiast. Mr. Bones is also very handsome, and definitely did not write his own description.
Associate Attorney
Wiggle M. Bones, Esq.
When you think business, think “Wiggle M. Bones.”
Mr Bones is a no-nonsense vertibrate who sees through the calcium - saving you time and money when it counts. Mr. Bones is a local contributor to the Dark & Spooky Weekly, frequently prepares opinion letters on bone chilling subjects, and receives all matters of work that Herbert would honestly rather not do, given the weather outside. It’s very nice, and Mr. Wiggle Bones definitely appreciates those projects last minute. I mean your projects. Important business projects.
When not sleeping inside the office, Mr. Bones is an avid aquarium enthusiast and big game hunter.
Paralegal, Legal Assistant, Office Manager, Accountant, Librarian, Bone Duster, Account Collector, Account Executive, Administrative Analyst, Administrative Assistant, Administrative Manager, Administrative Specialist, Auditing Clerk, Bookkeeper, Branch Manager, Business Analyst, Business Manager, Data Entry Clerk, Executive Assistant, File Clerk, Human Resources, Office Assistant, Office Clerk, Office Manager, Program Administrator, Program Manager, Quality Control Coordinator, Receptionist, Risk Analyst, Risk Manager, Secretary
Turnte Dust
Rescued from the storage closet we assigned them to back in the 60s, Mr. Dust is an exemplary support personnel. Though not seen for approximately 3 years, we believe they are still in the office.
Mr. Dust does not have any hobbies or dreams which we are aware of.